How Brett Goldstein's mum tried to sneak into one of his gigs

Like many stand-ups, Brett Goldstein dreads the thought of his parents hearing his material – so he has banned them from his shows.

But the comic has now revealed how his mother employed bizarre measures to sneak into one performance.

‘I can't think of anything worse,’ the Superbob star said of the prospect of his parents hearing his most personal details.

‘They're very loving, supportive people and they want to come. But I have forbidden them,’ he told the Hardcore Listing Podcast. 'But, what is awful is I can't stop their friends coming… and that's a fucking nightmare. 

‘It's kind of intimate. It is a bit like wanking in front of strangers. I couldn't masturbate with my mum and dad watching.’

But Goldstein’s mum did try to circumvent the ban on watching him (do stand-up, that is) just two years into his comedy career.

He recalls appearing at Ginglik – an intimate venue in a former public toilet in London's Shepherd's Bush. ’I was pacing around outside the gig' he said. 'I was very nervous and was just smoking a cigarette.

'A woman came down the stairs to go into the gig, I locked eyes with her and it was my mum in a wig and I went "What the f...?"

'She turned straight around and went straight back up the stairs. I called her and I could hear her rushing away. "Did you genuinely just try to sneak into the gig in a wig?" And she was like, "I thought you wouldn't recognise me".

He replied incredulously: 'You're my mum! I know your face more than Mickey Mouse, of course I do. It's not like I'm playing the O2!’

Published: 21 Jun 2017