Katy Berry's Edinburgh Fringe binge, cringe and whinge...

Katy Berry, of Fringe improv stalwarts Baby Wants Candy, is in Edinburgh with her debut solo show Diamond Goddess Crystal Puss. Here she shares what she can't get enough of at the festival, her most embarrassing Edinburgh experience and the worst thing about the Fringe. Apart from the cost of accommodation, obviously…

Edinburgh binge

How can you choose just one thing to binge at the Fringe? That's like choosing one season of Bake Off. I love Sue AND Sandi!

 I guess I would like to surround myself with more men from the Circus Hub. Not in a sexual way. In the way that I wish to be surrounded by beautiful pottery. They all have 8-pack abs. 

When they balance their body weight on the tip of their dicks while spinning on a rubber pole, it's like going on safari to Middle Earth and discovering a new mythical creature. I want to find out where the Circus Hub bar is to exist among these people in their natural habitat - the women too. They are also incredible. I would be the fattest among them, but definitely the funniest. 

We would all bond and eventually they'd start calling me ‘Big Mama’. The goal is to start a street gang with me as the charismatic leader. 

Edinburgh cringe

Last year I was doing a performance of Shamilton and I got very excited and jumped off a wooden box as a dance move. I landed with a thud, but survived. Unfortunately, I have a weak pelvic floor. I don't know why, I do Pilates, but it's not doing the trick because when I landed I peed my pants a little. 

It just released. Not a ton, but enough that when I went to the sidelines I signalled for my friend to look at my cooter and she confirmed there was a pee spot. Oh well. 

I ended up improvising a song to the audience about how sometimes when you care about something and give it your all, you pee a little, and that should be celebrated. They were very understanding and supportive. 

Personally, I don't want to see any show at Fringe where the actors aren't pissing themselves. I bet Ian McKellen pisses himself every night in Hamlet. THAT is commitment to the craft. 

Edinburgh whinge

I don't like the hamburgers in Scotland. From what I hear, it's because you've all had a hell of a time with mad cow disease, so now all your beef is cooked to death. The burgers here taste like rubber boots. I think they can be used as door stoppers. Better safe than sorry, though! 

On the bright side, you all have Scotch eggs readily available at most Tescos, and we don't have those in America. They are a delicious treat and I would like more Americans to wrap their eggs in different tasty things. 

• Katy Berry’s debut show Diamond Goddess Crystal Puss is at Just The Tonic @ The Mash House – Bottle Room at 2.10pm

Published: 8 Aug 2023