Review of visiting American comedian and storyteller

Many a stand-up and armchair psychologist has reflected on comedians’ need for the approval of strangers – perhaps as compensation for a lack of childhood parental attention – or for their need to control a scripted one-way conversation to compensate for limited social skills.

Arriving in London following an off-Broadway run earlier this year, Gary Gulman’s Grandiloquent is a deep, personal dive into those very topics, prodding away at his hard-wired vulnerabilities. 

His story starts with his father leaving when he was one year old – or actually one-and-a-half, as his mother is keen to stress, lest we think dad was negligent – and his isolation is exacerbated by a bizarre decision to make him repeat the first grade of school, despite him being hugely precocious for his age.

He got into reading early – The Monster At The End Of This Book featuring Grover from Sesame Street being the gateway – and now gets laughs at the pretentiously florid language his seven-year-old self used.

Fast forward almost 50 years and the American has made a career out of being so very precise in his phrasing and vocabulary, which ensures he gets the most out of every wry observation, sardonic aside or silly exaggeration. 

It makes for a vivid, detail-packed portrayal of those early years, whether effectively acting as the hen-pecked ‘husband’ of his single Jewish mum, forming a close bond with his initial first-grade teacher, or reliving the animosity he felt towards her successor, who he dubs Ayn Rand, in ‘tribute’ to the darling of the conservative right.

Key to his account is how much lasting damage stifling young talent can inflict, given that was very much the mood of the ‘toughen up’ parenting he experienced in the 1970s, in contrast to the modern ethos towards encouraging or indulging every young interest. 

The rich tapestry Gulman weaves draws the audience in, along with his innate low-key charm. From a slowish start, we are soon engrossed in his tale, empathising with every injustice meted upon his delicate young self.

The comic takes the same care in his appearance as he does with his meticulous writing. With his tartan jacket and waistcoat, grey goatee and slightly shaggy hair, he looks like Billy Connolly had he smartened up for a court appearance. 

Some of the psychology might have been better left unsaid, leaving the audience to join the dots themselves, while the long section about the roots of grunge music is overdone, even if its very point is to mock his verbosity and nerdiness in a  self-deprecating way.  Suggesting such segments are over-long might be triggering, however, given his formative childhood memories of his mother silencing him with a definitive ‘genug’ – the Yiddish for ‘enough’ when he was showing off.

This is a storytelling show more than an out-and-out stand-up show, perhaps more akin to the approach of David Sedaris, fellow Massachusettsian Mike Birbiglia or our own Daniel Kitson (albeit a lot more directly personal than Kitson would countenance).

But it is amusing – containing surely the funniest description of a failed suicide attempt you’ll hear this year – while Gulman’s tendency towards intellectual grandstanding to overcompensate for a deeper insecurity have paid off well. He hopes his audience are just as learned – he’s noticeably disappointed when a Lord Of The Flies reference isn’t acknowledged by the room

The complex question of how much the ‘tough love’, or downright bullying, of the young Gulman has been beneficial in creating the nuanced, thoughtful comedian he is today is best left to him and his therapist to figure out. But that background has led to a heartfelt and involving show that exposes the make-up of a singularly eloquent comedian. 

• Gary Gulman: Grandiloquent is at the Soho Theatre until Saturday.

Review date: 9 Oct 2025
Reviewed by: Steve Bennett
Reviewed at: Soho Theatre