Emergency Question: What's the most trivial thing you've seen a child have a strop about? | Edinburgh Fringe comedians answer © Pixabay

Emergency Question: What's the most trivial thing you've seen a child have a strop about?

Edinburgh Fringe comedians answer

Every day until the end of the Fringe, we're asking one of Richard Herring's Emergency Questions from the RHLSTP podcast to comedians. Here's today's batch of insights...

When I was a kid I asked my friend why he put ketchup on his pasta and he was so upset he went to bed. I think it was 2pm Patrick Spicer whose show Who’s This All of a Sudden is on at Gilded Balloon at 6:20pm

This child was upset because there wasn't enough vegetables on his plate. Kids these days... Schalk Bezuidenhout whose show I'll Make Laugh To You (Like You Want Me To) is on at Gilded Balloon at 7:40pm

My daughter cried for four hours because her stick-on bindi fell off after having a Hindu learning lesson in reception.   Justin Moorhouse whose show Stretch & Think is on at Gilded Balloon at 7:30pm

Shouting at the wind to stop . Hatty Ashdown whose show The Worry Drawer  is on at Voodoo Rooms  at 2:00pm

Sand too wet!  Kylie Brakeman whose show Linda Hollywood's Big Hollywood Night is on at Gilded Balloon at 7:00pm

Putting my cigarette out on their ice lolly. Just wipe off the ash and get on with your day. Marcel Lucont whose show Marcel Lucont Etc. - A Chat Show is on at Just The Tonic at 6:30pm

I once to sit through a friend's child complaining that her Play-Doh ‘wasn't green enough’ for close to half an hour   Sean McLoughlin whose show So Be It is on at Pleasance Courtyard at 7:55pm

As a father of two young boys. I could write an essay on this but would have to say that my youngest kicks off big time if his dinner is served on the plates we have with giraffes printed on them as the giraffes will 'pee on his food'. Not worth the agro  Iain MacDonald whose show Pundemic is on at Three Sisters at 10:45am

One of the kids that I used to teach had a full-on meltdown because she didn't have an eating disorder and so couldn't write as interesting a speech as her classmate for their public speaking competition. Cerys Bradley whose show Sportsperson is on at Gilded Balloon at 4:40pm

My step daughter once drew a really angsty drawing of a puppet being shouted at by grown ups. It had lots of thought bubbles with things like 'No one hears me' and 'I just want to scream' and 'Anger is taking over'. It turned out she'd drawn it because she was annoyed that I wouldn't lend her my AirPods Lucy Frederick whose show Lucy Frederick's Big Fat Wedding is on at Gilded Balloon Patterhoose at 3:40pm

Once my child screamed, with real tears, "IT'S LIKE I DON'T EVEN HAVE A FAMILY ANY MORE!" from the toilet when I asked her to wipe her own bum.  Abby Wambaugh whose show Abby Wambaugh and Bronwyn Sweeney is on at The Stand at 8:35pm

Oh I mean everything, they’re such losers. At the swimming pool the other day there was a child crying because it wanted to get in the pool. The child was in the pool at the time. Riddle me that.  Ciarán Dowd whose show King Rodolfo is on at Pleasance Courtyard at 9:00pm

My friend's son didn't believe me that I hadn't heard of one of the dinosaurs in his book. ‘Vix, how can this possible be new to you? They're like a million years old I was mortified.   Vix Leyton whose show Pedestrian is on at   Just the tonic at 2:40pm

Not getting to flush the toilet herself.  Melissa Stephens whose show Hot Dogs & Tears is on at Assembly Rooms at 7:40pm

Lost a rock he'd found on a pebble beach. Jay Bennett whose show Yasmine Day: Songs in the Key of Me is on at Voodoo Rooms at 7:40pm

Not being allowed to eat grass instead of his Red Leicester cheese picnic  Tom Skelton whose show 2020 Visions (What if I hadn't gone blind?) is on at Underbelly at 7:15pm

Not being able to eat the same biscuit twice.  Ali Brice whose show I Tried To Be Funny, But You Weren't Looking is on at Banshee Labyrinth at 4:50pm

My niece kicking off because my sister wouldn't let her drink bleach.  Crizards whose show Cowboys is on at Assembly at 10:15pm

My cousin one time threw a fit at two because we took away her books and she was "studying"... Tom DeTrinis whose show I Hate New York is on at Assembly at 6:20pm

My child stropped because he didn’t want to go out despite the fact that we were not going anywhere Emmanuel Sonubi whose show Emancipated is on at Underbelly Bristo Square at 6:10pm

A friend's son once threw a paddy because my wife couldn't transform into the Incredible Hulk; pretty valid.  David Ephgrave whose show Good Grief - Edinburgh Fringe 2022 at Chortle.co.uk">David Ephgrave: Good Grief is on at Just the Tonic at the Caves at 2:40pm

I once saw my brother lose his mind about not being able to eat a giant inedible display cookie in a shopping centre. Good times. Alex MacKeith whose show Thanks for Listening  is on at Underbelly at 2:45pm

From Steph - I worked as a nanny for two boys who both had long haircuts. After taking them to the barber, the older boy looked at himself in the mirror and said, "I am totally from the 70’s." The younger boy started wailing and cried, "I’m never from the 70’s!!!" The Fremonts (Stephanie Dodd and Justin Badger)  whose show The Failure Cabaret is on at Underbelly Cowgate at 9:05pm

Published: 20 Aug 2022

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