Alasdair Beckett-King shares the best and worst of Edinburgh

Alasdair Beckett-King is back at the Edinburgh Fringe. Here he shares what he can't get enough of at the festival, his most embarrassing Edinburgh experience and the worst thing about the Fringe. Apart from the cost of accommodation, obviously…

Edinburgh binge

I like that I have a mental map of Edinburgh’s Old Town which would rival that of a 17th Century pickpocket. The streets of the city were laid out by Piranesi with a little help from Escher, and I know them all. There’s no flight of stairs I haven’t climbed to avoid a silent disco. There’s no wynd I haven’t ducked down to escape an outdoor performance of Medea, which is somehow also a musical about Brexit.

But, if I’m being honest, my favourite part of the Edinburgh Festival is doing the shows. Writing that makes me feel like an insufferable teacher’s pet, putting his hand up and saying, ‘I actually like school, miss,’ but it’s true. Mostly. I don’t always enjoy every single show. Not the ones on Tuesdays, or when it’s raining, or when half the audience is an Italian funeral party who joined the wrong queue. But the reason I go is that I like putting on a show.

 Edinburgh cringe

It’s almost impossible to isolate a single embarrassing Fringe memory. They all flash before my eyes in a horrible montage, like when Milla Jovovich learns about the crimes of humanity in The Fifth Element. And I have red hair too, so by all means, picture me in the outfit.

When I was a brand new comedian, I tried to give a flyer for my mixed-bill show to the much-loved Scottish comic Fred MacAulay. I looked up at his face only after uttering the words, ‘Do you like comedy?’ To his credit, Mr MacAulay politely declined the flyer, avoiding phrases such as, ‘Do you know who I am?’ and ‘I’m Fred fucking MacAulay,’ which would have been more than justified under the circumstances.

Edinburgh whinge

You mean, apart from the fact that it’s impossible to get Fred MacAulay to come to your mixed-bill show starting at 11.30pm in the Banshee Labyrinth?

My most petulant Edinburgh whinge is about reviews that give half-stars. (Yeah, Chortle.co.uk, you heard me!) If a comedy show absolutely must be rated out of five, then rate it out of five. Don’t rate it out of ten and try to take me for a mug. Everyone knows that a 3.5* show is going to be pretty funny. 3.5/5 is 70 per cent! That’s nearly an A, if you did your GCSEs in the 90s. But you can’t put a 3.5* review on a poster. It basically means your show is good, but you’re not allowed to tell anyone.

In an ideal world, reviewers would exclusively review 1* shows, because those are the only reviews other comedians actually want to read.

•Alasdair Beckett-King will be performing King of Crumbs at Pleasance Dome at 8pm from tomorrow to August 11.

Published: 29 Jul 2025