Ed Miliband joke is a real cracker | Jibe wins Christmas gag contest © Creative Commons

Ed Miliband joke is a real cracker

Jibe wins Christmas gag contest

A gag about Ed Miliband's election defeat has been named the best Christmas cracker joke of the year.

The line - 'Why does Ed Miliband like advent calendars? Because he gets to open the door to Number 10' – topped a competition run by TV channel Gold.

It was written by 44-year-old David Lawrence from London, who wins a £1,500 holiday voucher –  a small price for all the publicity the joke is generatinh.

Gold are making the best gags – which had to be topical, Christmassy and short enough to fit into a tweet – into their own crackers.

Ed Miliband Christmas Cracker

The rest of the top 20 are as follows, although the writers' names were not given:

I told my Granddad to go to Amazon for his Christmas shopping. He phoned me two days later from Brazil.

Why were Jeremy Clarkson's colleagues excited to try his mulled wine? Because they'd been floored by his punch.

How does Darth Vader like his Christmas turkey? On the dark side.

Why did Santa pour Lemsip into the chimney? He was coming down with the flue.

Why don't Volkswagen hold Christmas Services? They get the readings wrong.

Why is there no Champagne at the Chelsea Christmas party? Because Mourinho got rid of the Fizzy-o.

Why was the turkey at the Talk Talk Christmas party such a mess? It was hacked.

Who's Rudolph's favourite pop star? Beyon-sleigh

What do Wikileaks staff have with their Christmas turkey? An anonymous sauce.

Why won't Tom Jones be carol singing this Christmas? He's lost his Voice.

Why didn't people like the new Apple Mac themed advent calendars? They didn't have any Windows.

Why doesn't anyone trust Jeremy Corbyn to put up the Christmas tree? Because it always leans to the left.

My gran knitted me a really embarrassing jumper for Christmas this year. It's got fifty shades of grey.

What happens when Jedis get up too early on Christmas Morning? The Force Awakens.

Who saved Santa the job of creating a naughty list? Ashley Madison.

What did Taylor Swift do when she was covered in snow? Shake it off.

What are Little Mix saying to Perrie this Christmas? Forget about the Zayn deer.

Why does Len Goodman insist on a selection box at Christmas? Because he enjoys a good Twirl.

How do we know what Father Christmas has for dinner? He posts it on InSantagram.

Published: 15 Dec 2015

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