WTF: Weekly Triva File

• ‘A funny woman doesn’t attract men… she intimidates them,’ Lynne Parker of Funny Women, which aims to promote female stand-ups.

• Ross Noble wasn’t too impressed with the Pope praying for those who, like him, who were affected by the Australian bush fires. ‘I just lost my house in a massive fire,’ the comic says. ‘And what does he do? Light a fucking candle.’

• Tim Vine’s first job was in Allders department store in Croydon. ‘My favourite department was toys, he said, ‘but my least favourite was net curtains - there was so much pressure to cut them properly.’

• Ever wondered just how many times more likely Scottish drivers would be to stop to help Hollywood star Kiera Knightley change a flat tyre than Russell Brand? Well, wonder no more. It’s ten. Scottish drivers are ten times more likely to stop to help Hollywood star Kiera Knightley change a flat tyre than Russell Brand. Thanks, PR industry for your contribution to the sum of human knowledge.

• Talking of Brand, he Twitters from Bournemouth: ‘Mayhem at the seaside, the gulls are ministers of Satan. One of ‘em pecked me so hard, my willy done a burp. Bill Oddie never mentions the risks.’

• We’re indebted to one B. Burns for this contribution to our collection of bad stand-up. Ladies and gentlemen, we present – Tampon Man:
  

• Stand-up Al Pitcher’s current tour involves him taking pictures of the town he is performing in during the day, then talking about them on stage at night. But his activities led to a brush with the law in Carlisle last week when the 36-year-old comic was stopped a policewoman responding to a call about a suspicious man taking picture of banks. Pitcher said: ‘She radioed in saying “I think I’ve found him. White, scruffy, unshaven male, 20-30 years”. 20-30 years? Result!’.

• Mathew Horne used to play in goal for Notts County juniors.

• Richard Pryor's son Mason uses his famous name to chat-up girls – but admits: ‘It really doesn’t work.’ The 21-year-old, who is also a comedian, says: ‘You tell a girl, “I’m Richard Pryor's son” and they go, “Who's that? The guy with the afro?”’ How soon they forget...

• Chris Martin – the young stand-up not the Mr Gwyneth Paltrow – is to play a game of Twenty20 cricket at Mount Everest base camp – a nine-day trek from civilisation, 5,165m up in the Himalayas. Problems will include lack of oxygen, altitude sickness and the lack of sleep in getting there. More info at www.cricketoneverest.com.

SOURCES: Metro, Chortle, Croydon Advertiser, Blackcircles.com, Twitter, YouTube, Chortle, Observer, Holland Sentinal, Chortle.

Published: 6 Mar 2009