• American stand-up Sarah Silverman was sent to a psychiatrist for depression when she was 13. But she showed up for one appointment to find he killed himself. I swear to God it's true,' she says. 'I had to wait for the restof the hour for my Mom to pick me up.

• Guess which comic this is, right? Answer below.

• This is rather wonderful. Stephen Fry has lent his voice to a talking alarm clock, which eases you into the morning like a perfect with such soothing wake-up calls as: 'I'm so sorry to disturb you, sir, but it appears to be morning. Very inconvenient, I agree, sir. I believe it is the rotation of the earth which is to blame, sir.' Listen to more samples, and order, at www.voco.uk.com

• Scott Capurro reckons Phillip Schofield 'should be shot in the back of his pumpkin head at sunrise'. Charmer.

• David Walliams spent £500 in a trip to London*s Spearmint Rhino poledancing club.

• Terry Wogan is a big fan of Russell Brand, saying: 'He's quick and clever. Maybe a bit immature, but there's nothing wrong with a bit of immaturity.' Of course, the fact they both work for Radio 2 has nothing to do with the praise.

• Stand-up veteran Arthus Smith has something he wants to get off his chest during his forthcoming Audience With... tour. I'll apologise for starting Ruby Wax's career,’ he says.

• And the answer to the teaser was... Jimmy Carr. It's his Avatar for the gig he's doing in the virtual reality world Second Life on February 3.

SOURCES: New York Times, The London Paper, News Of The World, Heat, Bucks Free Press.