Ten things you do at the Fringe when no one's looking
1. Dance around naked in your apartment playing air guitar after a good review then cry violently into a pillow after a bad one. All in one morning.
2. Ask how much things cost at Poundland.
3. Visualise farting into the person’s face who just threw your flyer into a trash bin right in front of you.
4. Pick your flyer out of that same trash bin and gently console it
5. Alternate between talking to giant posters and serenading seagulls.
6. Make yourself throw up in a bathroom because you don’t want the Scots to know you can’t handle your liquor.
7. Get lost on the way to your own venue in week 3
8. Eat three cheese crepes and two Nutella crepes in a row and then go back to the Loft bar and pretend you had to make a phone call.
9. Google the hot guy flyering next to you, then pretend you’ve never heard of him.
10. (For Americans) Decide you’re not playing the Scottish hot & cold tap game and give up washing your hands for the month
Luice Pohl: Cry Me A Liver, Gilded Balloon 16:00
Published: 23 Aug 2015