Adam Millar on why funny women are sexy

Surely it can’t just be me who finds comediennes the sexiest people on the planet? Come on, female and funny? Those are two of the three sexiest ‘f’ words in existence. The list of ludicrously sexy comediennes: Josie Long, Jennifer Saunders, Laura Solon, Jo Brand (if she tidied herself up a bit), Rita Rudner (Dear God, boy! What is she now? 55! Cold bath, now!).

It’s not just me who finds members of the opposite sex with a sense of humour arousing. In fact, I’d guarantee at least half the population of the UK does. Unfortunately, that half of the population would be women, making men like me colossal sexual deviants. Actually there have to be other men out there with my tastes. Men go on the internet because they find pictures of feet and sex with kitchen appliances (I can only guess) a turn-on. Other carriers of the Y chromosome must share my disturbed fetish.

And by the way, when I say I like women with a sense of humour, I don’t mean in the Cosmo ‘When a man says he likes a woman with a sense of humour, he really means he likes a woman who laughs at his jokes’ way. If any woman found any of my jokes funny I would lose all respect for them. But I do mean it: Funny women are sexy.

What it is exactly about humour being sexy in a woman is hard to define. It should be as clear and universally acknowledged as big breasts, a wide smile or Peppermint Patty from the Peanuts cartoon equating to sexy (I’m not the only one who feels that way, right?). Funny equals sexy, the end.

Biologically it makes sense. A person’s sense of humour has always corresponded with their intelligence. The human brain keeps getting larger throughout our development as a species. Therefore, big brains are sexy, humour is a sign of intelligence, so, funny is sexy. QED.

See, I’m not a sick freak at all. My tastes are not aberrant, but normal. Now if I only had such an air-tight rationale for fancying Stephanie from that Lazy Town CBBC show. No? Damn.

Published: 7 Jan 2008