Comedy Store: Live And Uncut

2013 cinema release

More Hal Cruttenden videos

Hal Cruttenden originally trained as an actor at the Central School of Speech and Drama, and has appeared in the likes of Eastenders and Kavanagh QC.

But as a stand-up, his main break came in 2002, when he was nominated for the Perrier best newcomer award for his solo show Hal. He returned in 2003 with a follow-up To Hal and Back, and in 2005 as part of The Monkey Butlers sketch group.

He is now a regular at most the big club on the circuit, and has performed around the world, including appearances at Montreal’s Just for Laughs comedy festival in 2004 and at the Kilkenny Cat Laughs comedy festival in 2005.

He is also a writer, with credits including BBC One’s Omid Djalili Show.

Nominated for best club comic in the 2012 Chortle awards.

What's So Funny? End of conference stand-up show
Live Review
British Library

The British Library is fast becoming an unlikely fixture on the London comedy circuit. Robin Ince has been here with his Book Club – which makes sense – Andy Zaltzman’s brought Political Animal here; and now a stand-up gig to close a day of discussions on some academic aspects of comedy.

Held in a comfortable lecture theatre, it’s the sort of gig where Ince, on tonight too, doesn’t stand out shuffling on with an armful of literature, Alistair Barrie brings on a portfolio pad and host Tiffany Stevenson brings on… a glass of red wine. It’s only a shame the audience can’t bring booze into these plush environs as well.

But it’s apposite as one of her nicest gags involves wordplay about why she’s like a bottle of plonk. There is a good smattering of nifty puns in her set, as well as a snappy malapropism or two, although her longer routines tend to lose their way – such as a roundabout yarn about her boyfriend tackling a mouse –  or start from an uninspiring premise: what if Hitler had Facebook (‘Himmler likes this’ etc etc etc).

Yet thought her amiable banter she mustered up something approaching a club atmosphere among the mix of students and older library regulars that comprised this unusual audience.

Not that Ince is exactly your standard club act. Rather than questions like ‘Who here smokes dope?’, he asks ‘Who here takes an empirical view of philosophy?’ But then this is the sort of audience who are always going to be intellectually flattered by such an approach.

Following the Wittgenstein material, our cardigan-wearing comic offers a more down-the-line observational routine about poor use of language that doesn’t particularly surprise, before returning to his favourite topic of bad writing, with readings of an overblown giant crab horror epic and an hilariously clunky Danielle Steel poem, sometimes accompanied by the willowy frame of Ben Moor, contorting into strange shapes to wittily, if unusually, illustrate the narrative.

Next up, Barrie took a line of very little resistance, with his easy and often superficial comments from his liberal-left standpoint. America as the world bully, with Britain his annoying mate goading him on, is an old and obvious idea, while picking apart Sarah Palin’s stupid statements is like shooting Alaskan deer in the head.

There are some good lines amid the unchallenging polemic – about Britain heading backwards or an obscure George Bush fact regurgitated – but overall the writing needs more intensity and focus, even though the delivery is slickly assured. His putting on of stereotypical accents and his routine about the British ‘discovering’ places to the surprise of the people already living there were both overplayed, and his translation of the slogans of the right into more civilised language (on the aforementioned pad) seemed weak.

Having spoken about offensive comedy in a panel earlier in the day, Shazia Mirza offered a few lines about Muslims and Irish people wanting to blow people up. ‘Don’t be scared to laugh,’ she asserted at another point… as if it couldn’t possibly be the laziness of the stereotype that muted the response.

More relaxed than she used to be, Mirza hit a more productive seam with material about arranged marriages and her overbearing parents. But when she directs her comedy outwards rather than inwards, the effect can be more brutal than funny. When it comes to moaning about white and Asian kids who think they are ‘black’ (whatever that means, I suspect they’re not impersonating Nelson Mandela), or teachers knocking off at 3.30pm, the material needs more than just a sneer to succeed.

If Mirza evoked the day’s earlier ‘offensive comedy’ discussion, and the proletarian Stevenson the class-based one, headliner Hal Cruttenden had the debate on camp comedy covered, his slightly effeminate posh voice meaning he’s forever being mistaken for gay despite his protestations, wife and children.

He claimed an inferiority complex about the venue – ‘I’m not one of the more intellectual acts’ – but his litany of middle-class concerns certainly struck a cord here, whether complaining about his rotund figure, minor ailments or lack of spark in his marriage. There’s an authenticity to the material, and he delivers it with affability, passion and rhythm, adroitly bouncing ideas around the audience as a set-up to each routine in a way that’s as charming as he is witty.

Cruttenden thought the audience might have been disappointed after he was announced as being ‘off the Royal Variety Performance’ but not being famous. But surely no one would have been, following this impressively strong set.

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One of the best comedians I have seen since going to live comedy gigs. Really brightened up an otherwise fairly miserable Leeds Thursday

Russell, April 2020

Saw Hal on Thursday at Kill for a Seat Llangollen. Funny as a funny thing! Something very endearing about this guy, the audience loved him. I wish the other bloke had been anywhere near as good!

SAM, November 2010

Saw Hal for the first time at Rob Brydon's show last night in Bournemouth... fantastic comedy and delivered brilliantly, would definitely pay to see this guy :o)

Lauren, November 2009

Ashamed to say I had never heard of this guy before last night when I saw him as Rob Brydon's support in Oxford. He was really refreshing and very funny. And oh how it gladdened my heart when he put that old 'Political correctness gone mad' chestnut where it belongs!

Elaine Griffiths, September 2009

I've been reviewing stand-up for years, and believe me Hal's as good as they get. Effortlessly in control, easelessly silly, endlessly banging out the gags... More please!

Michael Monkhouse, July 2008

Hal compared the World Stands Up last night. He was nearly the best act of the night. Some great quickfire gags

Chris, February 2008

Saw only 5 mins on The World Stands Up but it was brilliant... very funny! Especially the parts about when his kids grow up.

Steven Saunders, March 2007

Seen Hal twice now. At two very different audiences. He was great both times. Same material at both shows however, but that fact that it worked with two very different audiences is a testament to the "if it ain't broke..." theory.Love his material based on him sounding like Tony Blair!

Kevin Jackson, January 2007

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